Salary Disclosure

[wonderlee 1]

I only know my hubby & myself have no trust in each other. Perhaps he don't trust me more. Cos he don't declare to me his pay and other things. While he files my income tax, I'm more transparency to him. Conclusion is : I DON'T TRUST HIM AT ALL liao. Neither I feel SECURE with our marriage. Ask me if I'm happy with this marriage life I've .. of cos NOPE.... Maybe he feels the same that's why he keeps everything from me. And me, starting not wanting to share too. Why bother to tell someone whose heart is no longer with you? He thinks this way too, don't him?

For now, just leave it to our fate.

Edited April 30, 2010 by mstan_lee

[wonderlee 1]

yah...no help in part by some mothers who advise their daughters to live by the lase of "what mine is mine and what yours is mine"

Can't help even more when some mothers who advise their SONS to live by the lase of "what mine is mine and what yours is mine".

[chronograph 0]

I only know my hubby & myself have no trust in each other. Perhaps he don't trust me more. Cos he don't declare to me his pay and other things. While he files my income tax, I'm more transparency to him. Conclusion is : I DON'T TRUST HIM AT ALL liao. Neither I feel SECURE with our marriage. Ask me if I'm happy with this marriage life I've .. of cos NOPE.... Maybe he feels the same that's why he keeps everything from me. And me, starting not wanting to share too. Why bother to tell someone whose heart is no longer with you? He thinks this way too, don't him?

For now, just leave it to our fate.

Hope your husband is not reading this.

Have u ask your husband about his pay? Most man, u don't i don't tell u.

[eiffel76 1]

Errrr, money really matter. I purely making a wild guess: most divorcee due to finanance matter. Wives will feel more secured when family have sufficient money?

well the way singapore has shaped up to me, i thk yes money can lead to divorce. but there are also cases of infidelity, 3rd parties etc - applicable to both the husband and wife.

[wonderlee 1]

Hope your husband is not reading this.

Have u ask your husband about his pay? Most man, u don't i don't tell u.

I hope not

I did ask & told him that he don't trust me if he hide from me. But still, he chooses to hide, maybe he shares with other 'people' lor.

[musicbox 0]

Me and my husband disclose our incomes to each other since we were dating. Sometimes he earn more, then i catch up, later he catch up, and now i've more, haha! Who's earning more is not an issue to us coz we split our major expenses (housing loan, those repeating monthly expenses like utilities etc) equally, for small expenses we do not particular about who pay for it, e.g. meal or daily expenses, whoever can pay for it

My husband do not care bout financial planning, so i help him made most decisions but getting his permission in advance. I once read some financial management between husband and wife and i find it useful and true so i follow the idea, which says the wife and husband shd keep their own income in their own accounts, but can open a join account for expenses to be shared equally. So we practice this way, my savings is my savings, his savings is his savings, we both have the right to use our own savings in our own ways but keep each other informed about it. And we contribute an amount into the joint account monthly for those major expenses like housing loan and child expenses. So far no problem on our financial management method and we're transparent to each other about our income

[bepgof 20]

I only know my hubby & myself have no trust in each other. Perhaps he don't trust me more. Cos he don't declare to me his pay and other things. While he files my income tax, I'm more transparency to him. Conclusion is : I DON'T TRUST HIM AT ALL liao. Neither I feel SECURE with our marriage. Ask me if I'm happy with this marriage life I've .. of cos NOPE.... Maybe he feels the same that's why he keeps everything from me. And me, starting not wanting to share too. Why bother to tell someone whose heart is no longer with you? He thinks this way too, don't him?

For now, just leave it to our fate.

My God, now then read yr story. Husband & wife must have mutual trust lah, with unconditional love....tipoff: read 哥 林 多 前 书 1 Corinthians, chapter 13. No bible?, download from here. Read not just one, a few times. Especially verses 4-8.

http://www.o-bible.com/cgibin/ob.cgi?chapt...amp;version=bbe

Edited June 17, 2010 by bepgof

[bepgof 20]

Me and my husband disclose our incomes to each other since we were dating. Sometimes he earn more, then i catch up, later he catch up, and now i've more, haha! Who's earning more is not an issue to us coz we split our major expenses (housing loan, those repeating monthly expenses like utilities etc) equally, for small expenses we do not particular about who pay for it, e.g. meal or daily expenses, whoever can pay for it

My husband do not care bout financial planning, so i help him made most decisions but getting his permission in advance. I once read some financial management between husband and wife and i find it useful and true so i follow the idea, which says the wife and husband shd keep their own income in their own accounts, but can open a join account for expenses to be shared equally. So we practice this way, my savings is my savings, his savings is his savings, we both have the right to use our own savings in our own ways but keep each other informed about it. And we contribute an amount into the joint account monthly for those major expenses like housing loan and child expenses. So far no problem on our financial management method and we're transparent to each other about our income

Congrat! u got a "healty" system. Mostly wives like to be financial minister, husbands = PM or MP? Wives must allow husbands to play these 2 roles to have a "healthy" system. If husband all the time MP - no dignity, all days walking facing down. If all the time PM, the golden mountain one day becomes bitter valley.

Edited June 17, 2010 by bepgof

[bepgof 20]

Anyone here :

- Know spouse's singpass ID to acess to cpf, iras, hdb,....

- Know spouse's ID & password for his/her on-line bank accounts, stock broking firm account,....

- Know spouse's home computer password

- Whose name to apply for PUB, telecom....

Edited June 18, 2010 by bepgof

[wind30 2]

my current system is quite different from you guys.

I pay for BIG items like housing,

she pays for daily expenses like groceries, petrol, power bills, etc. Reason is that she usually does all the groceries and stuff so if she pays for them 100%, she learns to cut cost

[chronograph 0]

We have a joint account. My wife make monthly contribution to it and i only make yearly depending on my bonus payout. We tried not to withdraw from joint account unless big ticket stuffs like housing, reno etc.

I'm the one taking care of regular items, eg. phone bills, broadband bills, power bills, car instalment, petrol, maid, school fees etc and sometimes groceries as well.

Wife takes care of groceries mainly.

[jeda 0]

Anyone here :

- Know spouse's singpass ID to acess to cpf, iras, hdb,....

- Know spouse's ID & password for his/her on-line bank accounts, stock broking firm account,....

- Know spouse's home computer password

- Whose name to apply for PUB, telecom....

- me

- me cos all joint account (even email password i also have; and i have free access to his iphone/sms)

- what home computer password? no password.

- ?? should be using husband's name when we get the key to our first home.

when we were dating, his home allowance and my work salary used for dating expenses; his NS pay and an equivalent amount of my salary went into our joint account - which we later use for our wedding expenses. so even now, we don't have any separate bank accounts. it helps that we are both sensible spenders.

[bepgof 20]

Now's society/family financial structure is far more complicated that whether each know their respective incomes and income sources.

- Knowing each's and sharing is one of the mains key to a "sucessful" family. Must always respect each others. I tell you my story:

- She knows my everythings: all the ID, passwords to on-line bank accounts (written on book), holding all the bankbooks, insurance printouts, supplementary cards, passport, stock scripts, pay slips, property title deed.....

- I know her singpass, salary (roughly), insurances, nominee........

I allow her to her own "secret money"- on & off she told me the amount, but I don't quite bother. She takes charge of monthly household expenses, children's expenses.....

- She keeps my cheque book, she writes amount, I just provide signature. She has her own cheque bk.

- I transfer money online to/from a joint account to stocking firm. She keeps the book. I read the figures on-line.

- I access almost everythings on line, including insurance. She prefer Giro while I prefer cheque & online transaction.

- I deal with ID/contractors, she writes cheque I sign.

- I make spreadsheet calculation on house mortgage loan and make decision, she follows.

- I make spreadsheet calculation on details of selling/buying properties, she follow.

She has total discretion on almost all transactions, except buying/selling car, house, stocks, loan. Anyway, I inform her of what I bought/sold.

Edited June 20, 2010 by bepgof

[haiting 0]

Now's society/family financial structure is far more complicated that whether each know their respective incomes and income sources.

- Knowing each's and sharing is one of the mains key to a "sucessful" family. Must always respect each others. I tell you my story:

- She knows my everythings: all the ID, passwords to on-line bank accounts (written on book), holding all the bankbooks, insurance printouts, supplementary cards, passport, stock scripts, pay slips, property title deed.....

- I know her singpass, salary (roughly), insurances, nominee........

I allow her to her own "secret money"- on & off she told me the amount, but I don't quite bother. She takes charge of monthly household expenses, children's expenses.....

- She keeps my cheque book, she writes amount, I just provide signature. She has her own cheque bk.

- I transfer money online to/from a joint account to stocking firm. She keeps the book. I read the figures on-line.

- I access almost everythings on line, including insurance. She prefer Giro while I prefer cheque & online transaction.

- I deal with ID/contractors, she writes cheque I sign.

- I make spreadsheet calculation on house mortgage loan and make decision, she follows.

- I make spreadsheet calculation on details of selling/buying properties, she follow.

She has total discretion on almost all transactions, except buying/selling car, house, stocks, loan. Anyway, I inform her of what I bought/sold.

So nice. For my case, we have joint account and usually deduct all expenses from the joint account. I feel very burdened at times because even buying a wardrobe, I need my husband's permission... And he ever suggested to reduce the amount we put into the joint account so that less to spend. Though we have our personal accounts, but they are now our shared accounts after getting married, and I need his permission to spend the money in my personal accoutn as well. And sometimes I have the feeling that he disclose our financial status to his parents. Or he buys stock using his personal account after discussing with his parent without discussing/ informing me... I questioned him before and he got angry and told me that he could show me his bank statement monthly if really need to.

[bepgof 20]

So nice. For my case, we have joint account and usually deduct all expenses from the joint account. I feel very burdened at times because even buying a wardrobe, I need my husband's permission... And he ever suggested to reduce the amount we put into the joint account so that less to spend. Though we have our personal accounts, but they are now our shared accounts after getting married, and I need his permission to spend the money in my personal accoutn as well. And sometimes I have the feeling that he disclose our financial status to his parents. Or he buys stock using his personal account after discussing with his parent without discussing/ informing me... I questioned him before and he got angry and told me that he could show me his bank statement monthly if really need to.

I don't hold bankbooks and don't queue at banks, unless no choice. Bankbooks to me is useless, I access online, can always download transaction history. For those timed fixed deposits, just read the figures onlines and keep track the maturity dates.

Same for insurances, very complicated. Agents quits, new one take ove, tel changes, address change... I don't keep the covers. I keyed all essential data into computer and make one file, just update accordingly, at one glance.

Same for equities stocks, make a spreadsheet, keyed in all data manually to keep track. All files got passwords, writen down on a book, she knows, in case one day I suddenly call home by the Lord.

Edited June 22, 2010 by bepgof