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lynzi

How Big Is The Diamond On Your Engagement/proposal Ring?


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Dear all,

Thanks for your concern. My husband understands as I ever told him if he is not around (biz trips), I miss him and feel more freedom. So he asked me to sponsor him go on trip. Told him he doesn't even provide allowance, how to sponsor??? Well, as mentioned, he gave excuses that we are unable to go on any trips coz of son and I just came back from a short training trip in Jan. No $$$ to go travelling with gf also.

Anyway, it seems like these few days he is much better, give me freedom to go gym (signing up gym) and go out with friends when he goes and fetch our darling son from MIL hse. Previously he will let me do the fetching trips by myself while he got home early to chill out by himself. Only minus factor is that if I reach home after 10.00pm, he will asked me why I so late. Hee, but still, better than nothing!

We are both faithful to each other although we sometimes get tired of each other. But still, I do hope that he can be sensitive enough to certain small issues and stop comparing me to his IQ (or those career ladies out there) as well as looking down on my earnings.

Will keep trying hard to maintain good relationship with him, our extended families and my friends. :D

 

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Chamia you're so encouraging... more often than not I hear people wanting to give up rather than perservere on. Love is hard work alright, just like the marriage vows we took, for better AND for worse.

 

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Chamia you're so encouraging... more often than not I hear people wanting to give up rather than perservere on. Love is hard work alright, just like the marriage vows we took, for better AND for worse.

Hi chew@PPLe,

I am very pessimistic one. I wanted to call off a few times since last year but always endure towards the end. He isn't too bad, only MCP, some attitude problems towards me but still he saves and provided the basic protection and stuff to me. Sometimes, I feel that I may be on the wrong side as I cannot control on my spendings (which I am responsible for it myself) and the way I talk. I am quite talkative which he doesnt like, haha. Anyway, since a couple, try to be together towards the end. This is the chinese saying. I may get hurt, cry a bit, complain to closest pple around me but towards the end still stay together with him. Unless there is any 3rd party or he accuses me of any non-exist wrongdoings, then divorce will come in.

Sorry, this is suppose to be a 'How Big Is The Diamond...' thread but I guess I out of topic so many times....

 

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I understand... you know, my parents also fight a lot and say things like "if not for the children, I would have left this home" etc. But they didn't, which I am glad, becoz I've frens from broken families and also some within my own extended families. They grow up in insecurity and with no sense of identity, no motivation to excel, easily depressed etc. I believe you're making the right decision for your child.

As for out of topic heehee, how much can we go on abt the 4 Cs of diamond anyway? :dancingqueen: It's just a dead piece of stone at the end of the day ;) It's the "WHO" gave it to us that's more important :yamseng:

 

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As for out of topic heehee, how much can we go on abt the 4 Cs of diamond anyway? :sport-smiley-004: It's just a dead piece of stone at the end of the day :oIt's the "WHO" gave it to us that's more important :D

agree! :unsure:

 

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Dear all,

Thanks for your concern. My husband understands as I ever told him if he is not around (biz trips), I miss him and feel more freedom. So he asked me to sponsor him go on trip. Told him he doesn't even provide allowance, how to sponsor??? Well, as mentioned, he gave excuses that we are unable to go on any trips coz of son and I just came back from a short training trip in Jan. No $$$ to go travelling with gf also.

Anyway, it seems like these few days he is much better, give me freedom to go gym (signing up gym) and go out with friends when he goes and fetch our darling son from MIL hse. Previously he will let me do the fetching trips by myself while he got home early to chill out by himself. Only minus factor is that if I reach home after 10.00pm, he will asked me why I so late. Hee, but still, better than nothing!

We are both faithful to each other although we sometimes get tired of each other. But still, I do hope that he can be sensitive enough to certain small issues and stop comparing me to his IQ (or those career ladies out there) as well as looking down on my earnings.

Will keep trying hard to maintain good relationship with him, our extended families and my friends. 8|

jiayu jiayu 8| chamia...human always not satisfied one...

end of the day come to reality. btw chamia did you & your hubby went for pre marriage course?

 

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dun worry u are not the only one feeling this way. Sometimes when u r too used to each other its like dat one. my hb also the same lar..always give excuses last time about why he doesn't give roses etc etc until my face orh lu lu. but no choice lei..i picked him over the guys who give roses, romatic dinners etc etc.

but the end of the day..think of the bright side. at least there is someone by your side. :P

hubby doesn't have the habit of buying flowers to girls before he met me. this is what he told me. :)

but after we've been together liao and he tries to make a point to buy flowers to me on Vday. he can be romantic on special occasions. :(

 

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I understand... you know, my parents also fight a lot and say things like "if not for the children, I would have left this home" etc. But they didn't, which I am glad, becoz I've frens from broken families and also some within my own extended families. They grow up in insecurity and with no sense of identity, no motivation to excel, easily depressed etc. I believe you're making the right decision for your child.

As for out of topic heehee, how much can we go on abt the 4 Cs of diamond anyway? :notti: It's just a dead piece of stone at the end of the day :unsure: It's the "WHO" gave it to us that's more important :P

Heehee, ya lor......

dun worry u are not the only one feeling this way. Sometimes when u r too used to each other its like dat one. my hb also the same lar..always give excuses last time about why he doesn't give roses etc etc until my face orh lu lu. but no choice lei..i picked him over the guys who give roses, romatic dinners etc etc.

but the end of the day..think of the bright side. at least there is someone by your side. :P

When dating, during V day, gals selling roses approached him? I asked for it and you know, he ask and told me, "Tell me, if these roses besides being pretty, are they practical? Can they be eaten? If you said yes, I buy for you." I told him yes (think of rose tea, and food cooked with rose petals) but the thing is we both know it is impossible to cultivate my rose to be edible, thus, after that I never ask from him.

jiayu jiayu :lol: chamia...human always not satisfied one...

end of the day come to reality. btw chamia did you & your hubby went for pre marriage course?

Hey, LL, you yesterday not around huh? Ya, we human always asking for more and more.. But wat I want is only a bit more of sensitivity from him, that's all.

I did not attend any pre marriage course. Now thinking of going for marriage counselling, but I know he will not attend. Coz he always say that the problems lay with me alone, not him. So I really can't do much.

Yesterday he was giving me cold shoulder because I used the C C he supp me to buy sports apparels as I am thinking of taking up gym exercises. Less than $200 and he just simply won't talk to me. Was so upset that I went into the spare room to sleep. I find it is not a very big matter since he doesnt want to give even marketing allowances. If he gives me marketing allowances of only a few hundred dollars, I will not use that card.

 

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Heehee, ya lor......

When dating, during V day, gals selling roses approached him? I asked for it and you know, he ask and told me, "Tell me, if these roses besides being pretty, are they practical? Can they be eaten? If you said yes, I buy for you." I told him yes (think of rose tea, and food cooked with rose petals) but the thing is we both know it is impossible to cultivate my rose to be edible, thus, after that I never ask from him.

Hey, LL, you yesterday not around huh? Ya, we human always asking for more and more.. But wat I want is only a bit more of sensitivity from him, that's all.

I did not attend any pre marriage course. Now thinking of going for marriage counselling, but I know he will not attend. Coz he always say that the problems lay with me alone, not him. So I really can't do much.

Yesterday he was giving me cold shoulder because I used the C C he supp me to buy sports apparels as I am thinking of taking up gym exercises. Less than $200 and he just simply won't talk to me. Was so upset that I went into the spare room to sleep. I find it is not a very big matter since he doesnt want to give even marketing allowances. If he gives me marketing allowances of only a few hundred dollars, I will not use that card.

chamia , i can sense some problem , please do not drag or else things will be deeeper & deeper... all man wun wan to go counselling one.. mostly woman are the one we offer..

YEs Chamia , U mus force him to go counselling. please do not drag further..

its very unhealthy marriage. although this kind of things most pple see is very small issue. U noe tiny thingy issue in marriage will cause divorce.

 

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Heehee, ya lor......

When dating, during V day, gals selling roses approached him? I asked for it and you know, he ask and told me, "Tell me, if these roses besides being pretty, are they practical? Can they be eaten? If you said yes, I buy for you." I told him yes (think of rose tea, and food cooked with rose petals) but the thing is we both know it is impossible to cultivate my rose to be edible, thus, after that I never ask from him.

Hey, LL, you yesterday not around huh? Ya, we human always asking for more and more.. But wat I want is only a bit more of sensitivity from him, that's all.

I did not attend any pre marriage course. Now thinking of going for marriage counselling, but I know he will not attend. Coz he always say that the problems lay with me alone, not him. So I really can't do much.

Yesterday he was giving me cold shoulder because I used the C C he supp me to buy sports apparels as I am thinking of taking up gym exercises. Less than $200 and he just simply won't talk to me. Was so upset that I went into the spare room to sleep. I find it is not a very big matter since he doesnt want to give even marketing allowances. If he gives me marketing allowances of only a few hundred dollars, I will not use that card.

chamia, frankly speaking i feel very sad for you. i agree with diva that your hubby is rather strict about $$$. just b'cos you spent his $200 and he got angry with you. :unsure: so today did he talk to you? :( i agree with LL that you and your hubby should attend marriage counseling. :)

for me, if i like something and hubby will buy for me. he knows i like LV a lot and he'll buy them for me. recently, he bought me a brilliant rose diamond pendant. although not as expensive as the ring but it's still his "xin yi". :)

 

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humm...was he like this wen u two pak tor? sounds he is very strict on money matters. My advise is to talk over it gently ($ a very sensitive issue). a fren of mine hb earns way alot. his income 5-6k every mth but he pinches on the $ he spent on her and refused to go holidays with he becoz he feels is a waste of $$. He even refused to have a bb becoz he feels too expensive to raise a bb. :)

However i noticed he spend a lot of $$ on his toy car collection lei. but my fren still happy with him as she learnt to accept he is like dat and goes holidays herself with frens and buy things hereself using her own $$. She even buys into his idea of not having any bb becoz its very ex. Nonetheless, the fact is that she is still happy with him that matters.

for me my hb is very generous with me..he never grumbled any money i spent even thou its his $$. even sometimes when i badly wanted something but stopped myself due to the price...he would still eventually get it for me (but no doubt me still heartpain over the $$ he spent - so learn not to let him find out that i actually wanted something badly but stopped myself in front of him).

erm, your friend's hubby is such a strange man. he rather spending $$$ on non-living things than a baby. :( which man doesn't want to have a baby with his beloved wife? :) some men even rushing the wives to give birth. haha. :unsure:

 

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we were speechless wen she told us dat. and she said before that she had offered to split the cost of the flat together so he can save more. it wasn't really a good reason to get married thou.

dats y no kids no customary... nothing after 3 yrs already. zz

nevertheless they seemed happy together. so we respect her choice even thou it was an unusual arrangement.

ya, some people they want to save $$$ then will not hold customary. just ROM then that's it. :dunno: personally, i also feel that customary needs a lot of $$$ but that's once in a lifetime, manz! it'll be a memorable experience therefore we decided to hold customary. :dunno:

but not to have kids b'cos want to save $$$ and this will be the first time i heard it. :dancingqueen: w/o kids in a marriage is no good lah. somehow it feels incomplete. :)

 

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chamia, frankly speaking i feel very sad for you. i agree with diva that your hubby is rather strict about $$$. just b'cos you spent his $200 and he got angry with you. :sport-smiley-018: so today did he talk to you? :sport-smiley-004: i agree with LL that you and your hubby should attend marriage counseling. :notti:

for me, if i like something and hubby will buy for me. he knows i like LV a lot and he'll buy them for me. recently, he bought me a brilliant rose diamond pendant. although not as expensive as the ring but it's still his "xin yi". :sport-smiley-004:

Wah Korea, you have a good hubby who is willing to splurge on you, but not all guys are like that generous mah. It's ok to be prudent with $$ but have to be within reasonable means. Some ppl regard money as quite a big deal so that $200 might already mean frivolous spending by her hubby. Actually guys are like that lah, we spend hundreds of dollars, they grumble grumble and say we waste money, then they themselves dun even blink an eye when spending thousands of dollars on gadgets.

It's a double-standard world.

But Chamia, I do agree that perhaps both of you shd go for marriage counselling. Long-term wise, it's not healthy to kp everything broiled up within. Don't wait till you come to a stage where one of you exploded, which by then, any attempted form of remedy might be too late le...jia you for your marriage :(

 

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