Y Do Man Change Only After Staying Together

[apa 0]

Just tell your hubby

1) You know he has things on his mind.

2) He's probably not telling you because he doesn't want you to worry

3) Regardless, tell him you love him and hope he can find a solution and that you'll be there for him.

If he is having problems, he will appreciate what you tell him. If he's having affair or something he will now rethink it.

Its the best solution IMHO.

Sometimes, there are men who rather keep all the problems to himself because he feels that he tell you, you also cannot help.

Rather 2 person worry. He worry alone can already.

wat phantom says is so very true......

u can only choose to trust him (go along) or to doubt him (keep pushin). trust is the biggest hurdle u have to overcome.

end of the day, we can only give u our view but not much help. cos 解铃还需系铃人

feel bad.....

Edited August 14, 2008 by apa

[HT devil 0]

send cute nude pic or body paint is ok i think, i usualy also send to my male friends,and their wife some is my best friends. except the lady send really p*rn pic to ur hb.....

CRIED CRIED

how too make him speak...hmmm....actually u know better than us, cause u already 6 year with him, and like u said his add book only hv 4 contact from here u know already he is a person who dont knw how to expression his feeling,or chatty.and need a time to find a friend who can match with him.and u are the lucky one to be choose.

TRIED MANY YRS N STILL TRYING

u need to understand him, the more u want him to tell u the more he feel u are not a good person to tell(cause keep force him ),cause he need a very very relax time...to talk slowly and comfort with patient,let him speak to u when he want.let him feel he trust you really care and listen, not listen because u want to know.

TOO SLOW WILL FALL ASLEEP > COS ONLY BED TIME THAT I GOT A CHANCE TO TALK TO HIM

by checking his email actually =worst= u not trust him=more tired to talk to u

ONLY STARTED YEST

haiyaaaa my engriishhhhh is bad ar if not i can write alot alot liao hwuawhuawhauwa

HA HA MINE IS EVEN WORST

[CutePinkElephant 0]

u need to understand him, the more u want him to tell u the more he feel u are not a good person to tell(cause keep force him ),cause he need a very very relax time...to talk slowly and comfort with patient,let him speak to u when he want.let him feel he trust you really care and listen, not listen because u want to know.

TOO SLOW WILL FALL ASLEEP > COS ONLY BED TIME THAT I GOT A CHANCE TO TALK TO HIM

nah....nah...nah.... u got the point liao lohh.....gv him a TIME hahhaha.weekend ler...also dont hv time ar?

[Cantona7 0]

May i ask how long have u been married???

As to answer to ur thread...... Man actually didnt change at all even thou staying together, is just u got to see their real character in regard of man or woman too.

Marriage beside love it also involved compromise, we need to accept h.e.l.l lot of his/her bad habits or nonsenses when staying together. These are things we wont see in our countership.

I have a friend same story as ur, her ex-HB was also that type everything keep it to himself only later found out he is having an affair and that GF doesnt wan to let him go... so in the end divorce not becos of the affair but cant tolrate his bad habit.. I think this is a good option for her cos he really stress her out as she everytime had to worry for his business or thinking did that GF come and look for him again. My friend almost went into depression and her ex-huddy still act like nothing had happen or said living in his own world.

Again this is only my side of story and it doesnt apply to you cos at least he is not listerning to his handphone. WHY?? Becos if for me, I will SLAP my gf if she called me in the midnite wan me to die iszit..

Edited August 14, 2008 by Cantona7

[Cantona7 0]

U can try to put it to ur HB that u are veri disturb by the midnite call and having u said "NOBODY" called... did you consider my feeling as a wife too... How could a wife act nothing happen if the hubby hp keep ringing in the nite...

But again as a guy point of view he cannt admit to u, cos he cant tell u is a lady so he just had to keep quiet. So really no point keep asking him who called or bothering u...

[perpentual 0]

*Hugs*

Your hubby is a foreman in maintenance, is it because he is on 24/7 standby? Sorry, I read the posts, but hope I didnt miss out reading anything... read very fast...

I think he might be very stressful with work. Or had a bad patch at work to go through... Sometimes, the men just want to be left alone... When my SO is very stressful, he will be very quiet and also, mind is somewhere else...

As for the emails, I am sure that it was forwarded and forwarded by people. Like me, I also like to forward emails to all my friends...

I know you are trying to talk to him... take it slowly ok. If you push the man, they will rebound..

Will always be your listening ear... Take care

[Phantom 1]

wat phantom says is so very true......

u can only choose to trust him (go along) or to doubt him (keep pushin). trust is the biggest hurdle u have to overcome.

end of the day, we can only give u our view but not much help. cos 解铃还需系铃人

feel bad.....

Thanks. I always believe that you need the following ingredients in a relationship.

-Trust

-Love

-Money

Its always difficult to maintain a relationship and there will always be obstacles, but through it all, we learn to appreciate, understand and love our partners more.

[ahjane 2]

Becos if for me, I will SLAP my gf if she called me in the midnite wan me to die iszit..

so far..u have trained her well? haha

Edited August 14, 2008 by ahjane

[CutePinkElephant 0]

so far..u have trained her well? haha

cantona7 is a good trainer in this rite hahha

[Cantona7 0]

cantona7 is a good trainer in this rite hahha

Notti Elephant

[BunBun 5]

Did I see cantona7 say MY gf???? Bad Bad cantona7 Must tell your wife sia. :rofl:

Again this is only my side of story and it doesnt apply to you cos at least he is not listerning to his handphone. WHY?? Becos if for me, I will SLAP my gf if she called me in the midnite wan me to die iszit..

Hehehe CutePinkElephant I think so too, at least that what the impression is telling me.

cantona7 is a good trainer in this rite hahha

HT Devil, screaming, nagging is not going to work out as a form of communication. Since you've been together for many years and it is already difficult to draw him out. What attracted you to him that you stay with him for so long, even with his traits out in the open.

Seriously, a marriage is an OPEN concept of trust & love between 2 parties irregardless of the contract, ie; marriage certificate. That said, your hubby should be giving more effort to make it work than withdraw into his shell. What happens when you have kids? IMHO, its going to be so wierd when a father, a husband doesn't express his emotions adequately in the end? But this is a small issue at the moment cos your issue is due to his behaviour and the implict pictures the agent sent. What is it that bothers you most? His actions or the implict pictures? If you have some faith in him, you have to give him the benefit of doubt regards to the pictures. Its not like he is confirmed to be unfaithful now so I think you got to stand back and observe without giving him pressure.

[ahjane 2]

men..sometimes so easy to understand...got eat..sleep..play...happy liao...dun make them think too much or plan too much...sometimes so difficult....not straight to them point...hint hint and expect us to read their minds...

marriage is indeed a tiring and rewarding affair...and maintaining & building of trust and faith is always an on going project...

how long have u all been married? or having another GF? hehe

[CutePinkElephant 0]

Did I see cantona7 say MY gf???? Bad Bad cantona7 Must tell your wife sia. :rofl:

Hehehe CutePinkElephant I think so too, at least that what the impression is telling me.

hahhaah because of one thread start by cantona7 now he is bad image already hor...bun hwahwuawhauw....cantona7 dont play play fire arr....

men..sometimes so easy to understand...got eat..sleep..play...happy liao...dun make them think too much or plan too much...sometimes so difficult....not straight to them point...hint hint and expect us to read their minds...

marriage is indeed a tiring and rewarding affair...and maintaining & building of trust and faith is always an on going project...

how long have u all been married? or having another GF? hehe

ya...trust&communication is very important

me married for 6years nia...

[HT devil 0]

u need to understand him, the more u want him to tell u the more he feel u are not a good person to tell(cause keep force him ),cause he need a very very relax time...to talk slowly and comfort with patient,let him speak to u when he want.let him feel he trust you really care and listen, not listen because u want to know.

TOO SLOW WILL FALL ASLEEP > COS ONLY BED TIME THAT I GOT A CHANCE TO TALK TO HIM

nah....nah...nah.... u got the point liao lohh.....gv him a TIME hahhaha.weekend ler...also dont hv time ar?

weekend ??? maybe going for a movie n dinner........

[HT devil 0]

Cantona7.

ROM for 2 yrs . only moved in to stay together these past 3 wks. hee hee

know man don change becos of u.... well it only me who is changing....

ur story sound very familiar.... hee hee

Ur GF??? thought its wife?? ( read ur forum too)

so true that i know this NOBODY is somebody that he don wanna me to knw.

perpentual,

24/7??? nvr hear him say. even so , he should be picking up instead of no pickin up rite??

mind somewhere someplace lor..

Phantom.

urs is always so chim n so tue..

men..sometimes so easy to understand...got eat..sleep..play...happy liao...dun make them think too much or plan too much...sometimes so difficult....not straight to them point...hint hint and expect us to read their minds...

marriage is indeed a tiring and rewarding affair...and maintaining & building of trust and faith is always an on going project...

how long have u all been married? or having another GF? hehe

me married for 3 yrs this yr but only stay together this 3 wks

yest , i try to be romantic.. know what?? iburn armoma in the rm n know what happen??? he didn't close the rm close when he came in cos he say how to sleep with the rm such a smell.. sighhhhhhhhhh really don know what to say....

Edited August 15, 2008 by HT devil