tempus 0 Report post Posted May 29, 2008 Hi All, In a bit of a predicament here so hoping someone can shed some advice. Me and my husband married about 2+ years ago and we have a kid. Problem is after some argument, he completely disappeared. No calls, visits whatsoever from him for 2 years already. During the argument that time, we brought up the idea of divorce but he refused to. In fact he was violent towards me, hitting me and threatening my family members to get back at them for standing on my side (which family would not?). I desperately want to carry on with my life and want to get a divorce but problem is i'm afraid that he'll come and disturb my family and try and do something funny to my daughter. Now i wanted to apply for a HDB flat but HDB refused me and even after i explain to them my situation, they wanted to see document proofs like police report of missing person etc.. i would have made a police report if i can, i just afraid that something will happen to my kid. Question is, if i made a police report abt a missing person, will the police really go and find him, but i really dont want to see him again yet i want a divorce. Going thru lawyers is another option but can they really help...i'm really lost so any kind souls with such experience can advise, thanks.. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
CutePinkElephant 0 Report post Posted May 29, 2008 Hi All, In a bit of a predicament here so hoping someone can shed some advice. Me and my husband married about 2+ years ago and we have a kid. Problem is after some argument, he completely disappeared. No calls, visits whatsoever from him for 2 years already. During the argument that time, we brought up the idea of divorce but he refused to. In fact he was violent towards me, hitting me and threatening my family members to get back at them for standing on my side (which family would not?). I desperately want to carry on with my life and want to get a divorce but problem is i'm afraid that he'll come and disturb my family and try and do something funny to my daughter. Now i wanted to apply for a HDB flat but HDB refused me and even after i explain to them my situation, they wanted to see document proofs like police report of missing person etc.. i would have made a police report if i can, i just afraid that something will happen to my kid. Question is, if i made a police report abt a missing person, will the police really go and find him, but i really dont want to see him again yet i want a divorce. Going thru lawyers is another option but can they really help...i'm really lost so any kind souls with such experience can advise, thanks.. sorry to hear about that, but if u not do a police report about missing person how u can solve ur problem?(apply for hdb flat), like u said dont know the police really go and find or not.....the point is u can get the missing report so u can apply for hdb . im not sure about the the law so can't really comment ;( Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
BunBun 5 Report post Posted May 29, 2008 (edited) Your case is a little special but did you and your hubby buy a flat before and whether the place(if any) is in both your husband and your name right & whether your husband's CPF is still paying for the installment or not? Or else, since you are still legally married in the eyes of the law, HDB would def place you under a family nucleus criteria. That I suspect is why HDB wants to see proof first before reviewing your case on a basis. What you really need is to prove that you have had no contact with your hubby for the last 2 years other than the missing police report. Besides you can take out a PPO against him if you are worried for the safety of your family or your daughter. Perhaps you could seek the advice of a lawyer first before you determine which next best action you can take towards to tackle your problem. From what I heard before, you need to be separated from him for a period then you can get a divorce in his absence. Edited May 29, 2008 by BunBun Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Cantona7 0 Report post Posted May 30, 2008 Best is to seek lawyer advise, they are able to guide u thru the process. I got a friend same situation with you, MIA for quite some time due to his poor business. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
applefreak 1 Report post Posted May 30, 2008 lodge a missing person report if not there's nothing even a lawyer can do Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
yokine9a 1 Report post Posted May 31, 2008 Sad to hear that, hope you can pull thru this hard time. My suggestion is, make a police report abt his MIA. Since you 2 are separated for 2 yrs, I believe you can lodge a divorce without his presence. Then approach HDB to buy a flat for you and your daughter. Another person you can seek help is your MP, be it HDB issue or lawyer issue. As for your question if the police will really go to find him after you made the police report, the answer is no. They won't have the time to look for missing person under such situation. They simply make a note in their system to indicate that this guy has gone missing. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
latitude 0 Report post Posted May 31, 2008 maybe u get legal advice from Community Legal Clinic?? they gives needy members of public free basic legal advice and information. chk out their site http://www.lawsociety.org.sg/pro_bono/comm...egal_clinic.asp Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
tempus 0 Report post Posted June 2, 2008 Thanks for all your advice, will decide what to do soon... Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Roflmaoxz 0 Report post Posted June 3, 2008 Question is, if i made a police report abt a missing person, will the police really go and find him, but i really dont want to see him again yet i want a divorce. Going thru lawyers is another option but can they really help...i'm really lost so any kind souls with such experience can advise, thanks.. You shld seek medical attention from the doctors, and to get the doctors to proof that you have received physical abuse from your husband, this way you can get PPO from the family court for protection, and also to substantiate on your divorce grounds. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
hihihi 0 Report post Posted June 3, 2008 ya, apply for a Personal Protection Order (PPO). Then u can call police if that guy comes near u. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
crazycar 0 Report post Posted June 4, 2008 ya, apply for a Personal Protection Order (PPO). Then u can call police if that guy comes near u. hi, sorry to hear about your case. according to singapore law, u can file for divorce under any one of the following condition (provided u have been married for more than 3 years): • that your spouse has committed adultery, and you find it intolerable to live with him or her • that your spouse has behaved in such a way that you cannot reasonably be expected to live with him or her • that your spouse has deserted you for at least two years • if your spouse agrees to the divorce, that you and your spouse have been separated for at least three years • if your spouse does not agree to the divorce, that you and your spouse have been separated for at least four years. so if you husband has gone MIA for more than 2 years, u can file for divorce unilaterally under reason 3 above. therefore, pls go n file a police report and in fact back date to the date that he actually went MIA. if the court is satisfied that he has indeed deserted u and your child for 2 years, he cannot even contest the divorce. if he suddenly re-appears and threaten u, u can apply for PPO. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
tempus 0 Report post Posted June 6, 2008 hi, sorry to hear about your case. according to singapore law, u can file for divorce under any one of the following condition (provided u have been married for more than 3 years): • that your spouse has committed adultery, and you find it intolerable to live with him or her • that your spouse has behaved in such a way that you cannot reasonably be expected to live with him or her • that your spouse has deserted you for at least two years • if your spouse agrees to the divorce, that you and your spouse have been separated for at least three years • if your spouse does not agree to the divorce, that you and your spouse have been separated for at least four years. so if you husband has gone MIA for more than 2 years, u can file for divorce unilaterally under reason 3 above. therefore, pls go n file a police report and in fact back date to the date that he actually went MIA. if the court is satisfied that he has indeed deserted u and your child for 2 years, he cannot even contest the divorce. if he suddenly re-appears and threaten u, u can apply for PPO. ya already made a police report stating that he have no contact with me for the past 2 years but in the event of filing for divorce to the court, how can i prove that he's actually missing from my life for 2 years?? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
BunBun 5 Report post Posted June 6, 2008 Believe that when you're filing for divorce, the lawyer doing the paperwork will be in a good position to advise you on how to gather proof that he's been missing from your life for 2 years. ya already made a police report stating that he have no contact with me for the past 2 years but in the event of filing for divorce to the court, how can i prove that he's actually missing from my life for 2 years?? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
chiaangie 0 Report post Posted June 9, 2008 I'm not sure about applying for a Personal Protection Order (PPO) But the lawyer should be able to give advise. Why not ask your lawyer Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
